Mornings Are Fun

 I’ve been spoiled the last 12 years on mornings. 

Sure, maybe I helped by waking the kids up and making them breakfast, but then I grabbed my coffee tumbler, kissed everyone goodbye, and pranced out the door. 

Mornings have been a shock to the harsh reality of a two hour window of pushing, nagging, forgetting, stressing, cajoling and head shaking. Thank you to my wonderful husband for taking on this delightful time of day while I meanwhile sipped my latte to podcasts in the car. 

Why must we wait until the last minute to pack the gym bag, or take care of a #2? Do we REALLY need to find the missing handlebars to your toy motorcycle when we’re five minutes late already? Right now?

But it is my book of the week that is currently saving me. 

Having heard about it on a podcast, my husband asked for it for his birthday a few weeks ago. Being the teacher-nerd wife, I called ‘first dibs’ and read it last week. It talks about raising our kids to be autonomous; teaching them the drive and independence to essentially do their own nagging. 

Armed with my desire to raise humans who can function without incessant parental yelling, I’ve changed my morning filter. I told my daughter, “We’ll be leaving at 8:50 today. Do what you need to do to be ready.” I fought the urge to run down the checklist of everything I knew she needed. I battled my sarcasm about her still being in her pajamas watching “Liv and Maddie” on her I-phone when she should be dressed. 

To my kindergartener I said, “We have 20 minutes until we leave. Here are the jobs you need to do.” (written on a sticky note with pictures). And because the Self-Driven Child says I’m a “consultant” and can still be a supportive parent, I added, “Let me know if either of you need any help to get things done on time.”

Was it perfect that first day? Not a chance.    ….But it was a bit better. 

The breakthrough came this morning. Continuing my consultant role, I told them when we would be leaving and asked if they needed help. To my shock, they were both ready….early. On her own my daughter settled down at the table to review her science notes one more time for the test today. (Although she didn’t love that I captured this pic.) 

And my son put together a Lego truck from his pile of new birthday treasures. It was calm and pleasant by the time we needed to grab backpacks and get in the car. 

Will every day be a carbon copy of today? Undoubtably not. I’m sure tomorrow someone will forget their library book or refuse to wear pants.  But for today, I’m going to relish this win. And enjoy starting the day on a less-stressful foot. 

*** Book recommendation embedded! I think I’ll read it again….